Chapter 10: How to Make Photo Books
Using Lightroom’s Built-In Book Module
I wanted to name this chapter “Making Beautiful Photo Books,” but then I realized that some people might make a photo book of insects, or macro shots of insects, or worse yet, really close-up macro shots of gross insects, so I left the beautiful part out, because I gotta tell ya, if I see a book of insect shots, I’m outta there. I’d rather look at a photo book called “Extreme Public Porta-Potty Catastrophes,” than to see even one page of insects up close. Here’s why: even though an extreme porta-potty meltdown certainly doesn’t look pleasing, their real impact is when you’re there in person on the business end of the full aromatic experience—at that point, it’s a 4D experience that can make you pass out in seconds (I have run screaming from them on more than one occasion, yelling “I will pay anyone to chop off my entire nose right now!”). But, again, that’s in person. I might look at just a photo and think, “Man, now that is nasty! I’m so glad I’m not there!” But when I see an insect photo—especially a macro shot— I freak out like I’m in a porta-potty at high-noon, outside of Newark on a hot July day, with the outdoor normal relative humidity at like 97%, just as a fully-loaded 2007 Freightliner tractor-trailer rig accidentally backs into the porta-potty, and I realize that the entire unit is about to flip over on its side, if not upside down, and the door to the odoriferous sweatbox is now jammed shut by the force of the impact. That is how much I do not like seeing super icky insects up close (or at a distance) in any kind of photo book, and in fact, if you are a photographer that shoots that kind of skin-crawling creepy stuff, I suggest you skip this chapter. And, the Slide Show chapter. Maybe Web, too.