How Do I Do That In Lightroom? | Chapter 6: How to Print

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Chapter 6: How to Print

Working in the Print Module

Look, I’m trying to stay true to the vision of these chapter intros by starting each one with “How to,” and then naming the thing it shows you how to do (in this case, print), but in this case, the subhead (where I break down where we’ll be working) is kind of dumb looking (“Working in the Print Module”). I almost want to write the word “duh” at the end of the subhead, so you know that I know it’s totally obvious and majorly redundant. This is a side note, but believe it or not, I was in the military when I was younger and served under a guy named—and I am not making this up—Major Redundant, but of course, he didn’t spell his last name the same. He spelled it “Rhredondunt,” but he had this thick, almost Russian, accent. Anyway, when he said his name, it always sounded like he was saying “Redundant,” so we’d all snicker when he said it, and he said his name a lot, usually in the third person, so it was always “Major Redundant likes vodka” or “Major Redundant doesn’t want to go back to Chernobyl” or “Major Redundant wants more cabbage soup or some borscht.” Anyway, one day, part of our platoon was riding on a T-80 battle tank just outside of Novosibirsk and I had a few extra rubles, so we stopped at a Teremok to pick up a few crepes because we had a long ride coming up to where we would mass on some border of a peaceful East European nation just to scare the bejeezus out of them (ahh, good times, good times). Anyway, so we were on the border of some breakaway republic and I saw this guy waving his arms on the other side of the border, and he was holding up a boxed copy of Lightroom in one hand and a 70–200mm f/2.8 lens in the other, and he was waving me toward him. I looked over at Major Rhredondunt, and he was busy taking a bribe or chain-smoking or something, and the rest, as they say, is history. Well, made-up history, but history nonetheless. Well, it’s like I always say,
“Бабушка гадала, надвое сказала.”